Well, that was an interesting introduction. “Eight girls. One Dream. Tonight they fight..” IDOL DEATH MATCH?! “…to get into the top 12.” Ugggh, c’mon Ryan! Stop teasing me! This is getting rigoshdarndiculous!!
How long do I have to wait before somebody at Fox realizes that all this show needs is a little Idol on Idol violence?! We could build our own version of the Thunderdome and put the contestants in scantily clad outfits and then just let them battle for their lives. There will be an assortment of weapons to choose from and the contestants with the most screen time will get the best weapons while the people we didn’t see any footage from (they’ll get a spoon as a weapon) will be used as literal cannon fodder.
Just think about it.
Ellen was all over Simon before the show began. Scandalous? No, not really. I mean, with that haircut Simon might as well be a lesbian.
The pace for this episode was insane! Without the usual Idol filler I had a hard time taking notes on the contestants. I felt like a child at the end of a standardized test. “Pencils down, please.” “Oh, okay, just one second.” “Ahem… pencils down, now.” “Yeah yeah, just one more minute.” “PENCILS DOWN!” “STOP YELLING AT ME, I’M FRAGILE!!” Sorry… bad grade school memories.
So, before we look at the rankings for this episode, I would like to make a quick comment about American Idol. Look, this isn’t an “overall” type of competition. It’s not cumulative. One contestant could be great for twelve straight weeks and one off performance could eliminate him/her. So, this week is very important because it’s the contestants’ only shot to enter the finals. While I would love to rank these eight girls by how they have done over the past three weeks it wouldn’t be the appropriate way to go about the review. So, let’s look at who came out on top tonight and who faltered.
Here we go!
8. Paige Miles – Oh, no. “Smile” made me want to kill myself. That’s right… a song called “Smile” made me want to commit suicide by asphyxiating myself in Dom DeLuise’s dirty linens. There were flat moments, there were sharp moments, and then there were moments where Paige defied all music theory and messed up in an entirely new way. After the judges ripped her apart, and Ryan asked her why this song meant so much to here, Paige smiled and opened her mouth… This is it! She can connect with the viewers by explaining how this song helped her mother get out of depression or how it was playing in the car the day she almost drowned in a lake! So, what was the reason, Paige? “I really love Michael Jackson.” Oh, dear God. That’s the reason?! How was that a good story? NOT SAFE.
7. Katie Stevens – Oh Katie… your lower register needs some work, sweetheart. After hearing her version of “Breakaway” my initial impression was: so what? This is now the third week where Katie has struggled to be recognized by the judges and it’s starting to get old. It’s not that Katie has a bad voice. She doesn’t. But she is a blank slate contestant… and that absence of, well, anything makes it very hard for her to build up any sense of momentum. As Simon said, “You kind of sucked…” wait for it… “…the energy out of the room.” Ouch, Simon; brutal pause. NOT SAFE.
6. Katelyn Epperly – DON’T GET INTO THE INDIE CAT FIGHT, KATELYN!! How many times do I need to make this point? There are so many indie, unique contestants in the competition this year that it makes every week a bloody game of King of the Hill. There has to be so much vote splitting between Lilly, Crystal, Didi, and Lacey. Do you really want to dive into that shallow pool, Epperly? You might break your neck. “I Feel The Earth Move” would have been a great performance… if it was a week later. But, it’s not. So, Katelyn phoned in a quirky piano-driven number that she desperately needed to be great. This could be really dangerous. “Is that a guitar?” Hahaha, oh Ellen. You do my job for me. NOT SAFE.
5. Lilly Scott – Was she wearing mitten earrings? No, seriously, were Lilly Scott’s earrings little mittens? Like, little mittens that a child would wear. Or a cat. “I Fall To Pieces” was another impressive performance from Lilly and she is still a very dependable contestant. The song was a little sharp in the beginning, but then she brought it home in the end. My only worry is that Lilly is slowly becoming a little one-dimensional and I want to see what other tricks she has up her sleeves. But, if all she has up her sleeves are more creepy mittens, then I don’t want to see them. She scares me enough already. Here’s the deal with Lilly: I can’t tell yet if she is a threat or just a contestant trying to make it to sixth place. NEVER GOING HOME.
4. Lacey Brown – Hey, Lacey! Welcome back. Where did you go for the past two weeks? Because some chick was masquerading as you and she absolutely sucked. So, good to see you back. “The Story” was a perfect song choice and Lacey might actually have done enough to sneak into the top 12. Here’s Lacey’s strategy: just do well enough to beat out one or two people in the vote count until she makes the finale. Then, BAM! She’ll bring her “A” game! NOT SAFE.
3. Didi Benami – The funky acoustic version of “Rhianna” was brilliant and it brought Didi out of the weird funk that’s been swallowing her up the past two weeks. Also, Benami has an innate talent of being able to connect to a song like no other contestant in the competition. She can, on a good night, make us feel like we have heard this song for the first time. I think we can safely assume that Didi will make it into the top 12. After all, if “Lean On Me” didn’t kill her than this should be an easy week for her. NEVER GOING HOME.
2. Siobhan Magnus – I was absolutely furious with the British one after Siobhan’s performance. This was such a gorgeous vocal. I knew Siobhan had power, but I didn’t realize how much technique she holds as a vocalist. First off, the first half of the performance was acapella and she delicately balanced her pitch and dynamics to a perfect degree. “House of the Rising Sun” is not a safe song choice. So, Simon was dead wrong. It’s okay; he’s a man that hates emotion. Not to mention, Siobhan looks better and better every week. Jeez! I would say that this is, on a technical level, the best vocal we have heard in the semi-finals. Now, after saying that, I am still missing a little bit of that “x-factor.” Siobhan has the vocals. That’s not debatable. Does she have the star power? That little extra something? NOT SAFE.
1. Crystal Bowersox – Did anyone else think that Crystal sounded a little bit like Kelly when she sang “Give Me One Reason?” Just me? Look, there’s not much more I can say about Crystal Bowersox. She is the clear frontrunner and doesn’t show any signs of faltering or slowing down. If anything… she’s getting better as the weeks go on and that’s a really ominous sign for the rest of the contestants. Crystal is like a snowball rolling down a hill and the other contestants are just harmless twigs in her way. Simon was right. This is her competition to lose. NEVER GOING HOME.
Who should go home?
Katie and Paige
Who will go home?
Katie and Paige
See you next time!
NGH
Does anyone read these posts? Or do y’all just come here to chat? Am I wasting my time with the posts? Please Comment if you actually read this stuff
I agree with everything you said except I would love for the plant Didi to go home.
First, yes, I read them.
Second, I think that we all know Paige is going home. The part I don’t get is Didi love. She has not had a good performance yet. Not one. Even last night. I liked her during the tryouts and Hollywood because I thought there was something there. There isn’t. I also don’t understand all the Katie hate. I would send Didi home but that ain’t happening. Lacey should go home but it will be Paige and one of Katelyn/Lacey/Katie. Interestingly, I think Lacey is the only one who has no chance to win thing of those three.
Finally, what is the big buildup of the top 12? Yeah, it’s another step. But isn’t the really group the top 10. I mean, who really remembers who finishes 12th and 11th? Don’t 10 go on tour still? I think this is just pomp and circumstance, sort of like having a 3rd grade graduation ceremony, without any real substance.
And Lilly? Not good at all to me. A clear case of the Emperor not wearing any clothes. Much like Adam Lambert during country week. He sucked, he spit in the face of the week, and because he was so head and shoulders above everyone else, talent-wise, and because his performance was so bizarre, they gave him a pass in stunned silence. I thought Lilly last night was the same. As she stood there I had visions of her singing Tiptoe through the tulips next week and the judges doing the wave and bowing down in her honor. C’mon, guys. There is a big difference between “You are great” and “You stunk up the joint tonight, but we still love you and you are great”. Lilly was, to me, the latter.
I totally agree. It doesn’t even look good on paper – ie. American singing talent contest – the 21st Century – Patsy Cline – with a mandolin. Sounds like a re-hash of the Gong Show.
Read your review word for word. 50% agree with you.
Didi – “Rhianna” what Didi did to it was so wrong. Even if some did like it, one good performance is not enough to make up for her prior performances which are remembered and taken into account with last nights vote. I firmly do not believe she deserves to be safe, but acknowledge she is – this week.
Lacey – Not going home this week. Lacey has a large and organized fan base voting her through thick and thin. When there are fewer contestants, more voting for others, then she’ll go home.
Lilly – I truly like her and how very unique her voice is, but I listened to her performance a 2nd time last night and my nervous system felt as tho nails had ran down a chaulk-board. I can’t imagine listening to an entire CD of hers, but I would like hearing her mixed in with other artists. NOT SAFE
Who should go home?
Katie and Paige
Who will go home?
Lilly and Paige
You should creat a new category just for Paige and Katie, LEAVE NOW, YOU SUCK!
Siobhan Magnus – As I mentioned before, if anything takes Siophan out of this thing early, it will be her song choices. She sings them well, but no one would say that anything she has sung thus far sounds “current”.
Siobhan, listen to the radio girl. Listen to the songs that are hits from the ladies and pick songs that sound like that. Even if the theme is for an earlier time, pick songs that “sound” current.
Crystal Bowersox – Yeah, she is great, but who is her fan base?
Look at the big demos that vote on this show. Will teenage girls flock to Crystal? Maybe, but I don’t think so. She comes across as an old soul and doesn’t project youth at all. Not the hero of the ‘tweens. How about teenage boys? Unlikely as she isn’t what a teenage boy might consider ‘pretty’. Ok, 30-50 year old men. Again, her physical plainness may be a problem. 30-50 year old women. I think this is her “spot”. They can identify with her and grew up in a time when her sound was hot. Lastly the seniors. I’d say she does well here too for same reasons as the 30-50 year old females.
If Crystal can’t close the deal with the power-voting ‘tweens and 30-50 men, she may not be able to win this.
Who knows? If she does win, it could be argued that she will be the least physically attractive winner ever. WE can try to be altruistic and say it doesn’t matter, but it does. From Idols to Presidents, pretty matters.
And to the haters, I’m NOT saying Crystal is ugly. I’m saying that she is less physically attractive than you generally find in today’s female pop stars. For instance, name 3 popular female pop stars on the charts right now less attractive than Crystal?
Yep.
I totally agree. It doesn’t even look good on paper – ie. American singing talent contest – the 21st Century – Patsy Cline – with a mandolin.
Are you saying that Crystal is less physically attractive than say Ruben, Fantasia, or Taylor (I think she’s even better looking than Jordin)? Gotta disagree with you on this one Bill.
Once again, I agree with you, John. Crystal would be no where near the least attractive AI winner. And I happen to think she’s cute. Cuter than most of the winners, The only ones she is less attractive than are Carie and Kelly. (And Taylor and Cook, lol)
Joe,
I don’t think anyone said that Siobhan wasn’t attractive. As a matter of fact, I find her adorable (even if she does need Adam Lambert to pluck her eyebrows for her)
We were talking about Crystal’s appearance.
John, yes, that is what I am saying.
Although Ruben, Fantasia and Taylor weren’t strikingly attractive, they were all still more attractive that Crystal. That being said, how successful have the recording careers of those 3 been?
Not so much.
Crystal is not unattractive, she is just plain (currently), and in the pop world, plain doesn’t sell a lot of records. Lose a few pounds, veneers on the teeth and she might be able to transform into sort of a “Jewel” look. She kinda looks like Jewel’s “less-attractive-sister” already.
I got Siobhan on the brain, I meant Crystal. lol
Why do you have such a problem with crystal? I personally am not a big fan of shibbon but im not dissing her on the internet. As for my thoughts on the girls results I think that Paige and Katelyn will go home based on a lack of a true fan base. I think Katie will stay because of her fan base and Lacy I would have said will go home except she did have a great performance.
Joe you think Crystal is more attractive than all the winners except Kelly, Carrie, Cook and Taylor. What about Kris lol. I think he is the most attractive and Carrie.
1. Kris
2. Carrie
3. Jordin
4. David
5. Kelly
6. Taylor
7. Ruben
8. Fantasia
Lol, now look at me I’m judging who I think is most attractive. Favorite singer/artist would be
1. Kris
2. Carrie
3. Jordin
4. Kelly
5. David
6. Fantasia
7. Taylor
8. Ruben
So not much difference there from looks to who I prefer as an artist/singer to lol.