1. Michael Lynche: THANK YOU! While Michael’s performance wasn’t as good as the judges made it out to be (Crying, Kara? Really?), it was easily the best performance of the entire week. FINALLY, for the first time all season, one of the guys was able to take a song, grab it by the throat and make it work in his favor. Michael’s hammy- if not dorky- performance style (he actually made Todrick look subtle this week) kept this from being blow-away awesome, but his vocals here were damn near flawless. I don’t think that Big Mike will win this competition (“Idol” already has one Ruben Studdard- they’re probably not looking for another), but I think that he made himself into a Top 5 contender with what he did last night.

(BIG gap)

2. Casey James: Casey was probably #2 by default here, as most of the guys played it VERY conservative last night. I wasn’t that thrilled by what Casey did here, but his vocals were mostly on-point and he chose a song that fit his overall vibe. I still think that Casey is more Kings of Leon than he is Keith Urban, but this song didn’t do anything to hurt his chances of advancing to the next round. I think that I will back off on my prediction of him winning the show, however, until he shows me that he has a more commanding stage presence.

3. Lee DeWyze: I have to commend Lee for taking a relative risk here (although I HATE that song), but I’m not entirely sure that it will pay off for him. As the sage Kara mentioned (and I can’t believe that I’m actually agreeing with her), the thing that makes “Fireflies” a hit is the slick, electronic backing music and production. Stripped of that, the song just isn’t that good or memorable, as witnessed by Lee’s performance last night. I fear that we may be in for a shocker here, folks. According to DialIdol, Lee was in 7th place after last night’s vote. Not to impugn the credibility of the almighty DI, but I just can’t see him going home after two previous weeks of fairly strong performances. We’ll see.

4. Alex Lambert: As was the case with fellow Texan Casey (hell, a quarter of the Top 24 this season is from Texas), Alex played it really safe last night, and didn’t stretch far beyond his comfort zone. His vocals were mostly on-target, but not spectacular, which really didn’t complement his rather wooden stage presence. I thought that Alex might have put himself in some danger here, as his performance was even less memorable than Lee’s was, but DialIdol doesn’t show him in serious jeopardy. Again, we’ll see.

5. Tim Urban: Methinks that VFTW may want to re-think its chosen pick. Not that Tim was that great last night, or anything, but he certainly wasn’t as terrible as he had been in the past. Sorry to say, folks, but Tim’s not going anywhere. His good looks and improving stage presence (although, I must say that kissing the judges’ butts needs to stop NOW) will ensure that he’ll be around for weeks to come. Whether or not Tim becomes the second coming of Sanjaya is yet to be determined, although he at least has shown improvement from week-to-week.

6. Todrick Hall: Say goodbye to Todrick, folks. I know that I said that last week, and the dude proved me wrong, but I just can’t see him making the Top 12. If I’m being fair, I didn’t actually think he was that bad this week, if a bit too restrained (Yes, you read that right. For anyone who thought that Todrick was too OTT last night, I must ask you: Have you ever heard the original? Compared to Freddie, Todrick was a model of subtlety). I just have to believe that two weeks of crazy performances, revelations of his shady past and his diva personality will be the end of Mr. Hall. If he can manage to keep himself out of federal prison for interstate fraud, he may be a big hit on Broadway. He’s just not right for “Idol.”

7. Andrew Garcia: I wish to inform Mr. Garcia of my intent to sue him for personal injury, considering that the mental image of rubbing him “the right way” has blinded me for life. I never thought that I would be on the same mental wavelength as Simon, but the one word that was going through my mind as I was watching Andrew was “desperate.” I understand what he was thinking here: “Hey, performing an acoustic cover of a cheesy female dance-pop tune worked for me before. Why not try it again?” However, he neglected the fact that that kind of ironic performance only works when you have the element of surprise working in your favor. It doesn’t work as well once you’ve already done it. Quite simply, Andrew needs to go back to YouTube. However, I think that he’s built up enough fans to carry him past tonight.

8. Aaron Kelly: Why, Aaron, why? Why do you have to hurt me like that? I have been defending you on this board for the past three weeks (even though I can’t stand your style of music), claiming that you’re a dark horse for winning this competition, and what do you do in return? You give me THAT. Thanks, buddy. Way to make me look like a friggin’ moron. This was easily the worst performance of this week, and is in a strong competition with Tim Urban’s “Apologize” for worst of the season. Aaron should be going home for that atrocity, and probably will be.

Should Go Home: Aaron and Andrew

Will Go Home: Todrick and Aaron